social distancing | Upstate Music Therapy Center LLC

Five Stress Cushions for Children and Teens

by Amy Thomas | Oct 9, 2020

All children and teens react to life circumstances in different ways. The key is to recognize if a child or teen is showing new or accelerated reactions needing supports put in place. These supports can be referred to as cushions to stop stress from accelerating into traumatic events. With the recent pandemic, stress is one of the top buzz words.

Some parents report that their child is calmer and doing better since starting school at home during the pandemic and believe their stress would drastically increase if needing to go back. Others report that their child is engaging in new concerning behaviors they have never seen prior to March 2020. There are also families who are seeing an increased level of anxiety their child has previously been suffering with and attribute this due to the loss of a parent’s job, social isolation from peers, or concern over their family members becoming ill and possibly dying.

“Our natural response to scary things is biologically to release stress hormones,” said Dr. Nadine Burke Harris, a pediatrician and surgeon general of the state of California, and the author of “The Deepest Well: Healing the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Adversity.”

The release of stress hormones activates our fight or flight response. Our bodies, in responding with the release of stress hormones, are doing exactly what they should be doing. The video below is helpful for families to watch. It can assist them in better understanding stress and the effect on the mind and body. Gaining knowledge about anxiety is an important first step.

Younger children may show their stress through suddenly experiencing, temper tantrums, bed-wetting, or separation anxiety. Teens may show their’ s through withdrawing or moodiness. Music has been proven to be an important tool when individuals are experiencing stress. Music therapists use songs and music with children and teens for processing new information and self-expression. When working with a child who is experiencing anxiety the therapist observes the way they play the offered instruments, the instruments they choose, the words they say in relation to the lyrics of the song, or the tempo or volume they play. When working with a teen the therapist is watching body language, song lyrics they write or gravitate to, and the style and mood of the music they request. Songs can be written using the child or teens suggested words to create a shared experience between the therapist and client. Bringing the family or a chosen family member into this experience is another way to allow the parent to better understand how their child is feeling.

In some cases, stressful events can leave a child or teen feeling traumatized, but this can be mitigated with the hope of preventing increased levels of stress and potential trauma.

* Watch closely for new behaviors or intensity in behaviors. Write them down and speak with a professional to gain insight.

* Recognize that a child that was not at risk for coping with stress may now show signs and that children who were already at risk and have lost the supports will need to be watched carefully and new supports put in place.

* Do not assume that your child or teen is struggling with the changes, as not all will. Keep an open dialogue and be cautious to limit your conversation about your own personal feelings in the earshot of your child. Create the time and space where you can work through the challenges you are experiencing with another adult or trained listener.

* Create cushions between your child and the stress.

Below are 5 cushion strategies:

1) Teach your child that they can be a helper in situations, which creates a feeling of empowerment when otherwise feeling helpless.

2) Brainstorm creative ways to socialize with others through technology and outdoor spaces.

3) Provide a structured routine with flexibility for change as needed. Children crave routine. In addition, it is a wonderful practice to model how to go with the flow when a planned activity suddenly needs to change.

4) Engage in exercise. Physical activity can reduce anxiety and depression, improve mood, boost self-esteem, minimize stress, and enhance cognitive functioning. Find fun ways to get their bodies moving.

5) Contact a Music Therapist for consultation or services to create a cushion using music to reduce stress and create a non-threatening avenue for self-expression.

Mindfulness for Kids: 5 Breathing Activities

by Amy Thomas | May 15, 2020

Mindfulness has become more familiar in the western world over the last 40 years. It was mainly adopted by counselors working with individuals struggling with anxiety, compulsive disorders, and past trauma, training them to use this practice in and out of counseling. Later, yoga classes and adults looking for ways to relax began incorporating mindfulness.

Mindfulness is a mental state achieved by focusing one’s awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations without judgment. As its popularity spreads, we are now witnessing mindfulness classes in the community for adults, and schools are adding it into their curriculum for our children. This is largely due to the noted increase of stress in the lives of Americans and the impact on individuals of every age. Did you realize that April is Stress Awareness Month? Necessary, but also concerning!

There are some wonderful ways to help our children learn mindfulness practices while they are young, in hopes that they will carry these learned skills into their adulthood. There are many types of mindfulness activities, however this week we are focusing on breathing activities. We inhale and exhale all day long and yet rarely pay attention to the quality or pace. As we become more aware and train ourselves and our children to focus on our breathing, we will be better equipped to use these techniques when becoming stressed.

1. Squeeze Breathing – Have the child squeeze a trusted adult in a hug, give a self-hug, or squeeze a soft object. While doing so, breathe in through the nose and out slowly through the mouth three times. Getting the proper pace of breathing is important so initially, an adult should model slow breathing for the child.

2. Count Breathing– This style of slow breathing is helpful as the child can say a number prior to inhaling and exhaling, counting up to 5 or for as long as the breathing is helpful. Saying each number out loud helps the child stay focused.

3. Music Breathing – Exposing children to all styles of music is a wonderful gift. I find that piano music is especially calming. Listen to this example of Disney music properly paced for slow breathing. This audio is over three hours long, feel free to fast forward to add some variety to your mindfulness.

4. Visual Breathing – For children who respond positively to visual cues there are some great free videos online. I especially recommend those with a friendly character to help the child know when to inhale and when to exhale. You may want to try this video with an animated fish.

5. Alternate Nostril Breathing – Children respond positively to this type of breathing as they like the idea of plugging their nose. We have children use their pointer finger to hold one nostril closed and slowly breathe in and out one time through the open nostril. Then release that nostril and use the other pointer finger to plug the other nostril and repeat the breathing. They can alternate for as many times as the breathing is helpful in a slow rhythmic pattern.

For information about our counseling services with mindfulness training for adults and children use our Contact Us link.

Lean On Us

by Amy Thomas | May 8, 2020

In times of sorrow, how do you carry on? Do you call a loved one? Do you turn to nature? Or, is it a song that gets you through? At UMTC, we know that music can lift the spirits in a special way. In an effort to do just that, our very own Jamie Swieringa combined technology and music to bring smiles to a community of faces.

Jamie Swieringa is an employee at Upstate Music Therapy Center. Her caseload primarily resides at Midlakes Education Center (MEC) in Clifton Springs. Upon school closing in March, Jamie was inspired to utilize her craft to bring hope to her school community.

Jamie re-wrote the words to the Bill Withers classic “Lean on Me”. She changed the words to “Lean on Us” in hopes that the students and staff would be reminded of all the support present at MEC. It was her goal to foster community and let families know that MEC is there for them. The teachers and staff know how overwhelming this time is and they want to ensure families know they are supported.

Here is Jamie’s encouraging re-write:

Sometimes in our lives, we go through things, they may cause sorrow

Like not going to school, or seeing your friends

What will happen tomorrow?

Lean on us

When you’re not strong

And we’ll be your friend

We’ll help you carry on

For, it won’t be long

Until we’re going to see

Your face at school again

Please, reach out to us, if there are ideas you need to borrow

For, we all will try to meet your needs oh how we’ll help you so

You just call on me friend when you need a hand

We all need somebody to lean on

You just might have a problem that we’ll understand

We all need somebody to lean on

To implement her project, Jamie sang and played the song on Zoom. At first, she wanted everyone to sing together, but there were too many people! Instead of singing, she thought to have visuals from each participant. All the staff wrote out a message on paper to hold up such as “Stay strong”, “MEC rocks”, “Sanitize”, “We miss you”, “We love you” and “It will be okay”. The result was beautiful.

Jamie shared that this project was an emotional experience not only for the students but for the staff involved. The shared effort to bring hope to students through music was special for everyone.

Over the next couple of weeks, Jamie shared the video with her students through Zoom sessions and Class Dojo. The message eventually reached a wider audience and was featured on WHAM news Bright Spot on April 21.

Click here to check out the news story!

Music therapists understand that therapy isn’t just working on goals and objectives. We know that music is a unifying force. It brings people together, fosters community, and in times of sorrow, brings hope. Throughout this pandemic, UMTC is grateful to be part of our local school communities. It is our goal that with each music therapy session we can bring a little more joy into our student’s homes.

This blog was submitted by Katie Hall

Quarantine Self Care

by Amy Thomas | Apr 27, 2020

The sudden quarantine, beginning around the middle of March caused by the Coronavirus, created a panic for some. Many found themselves trying to determine what they should purchase and which errands to run prior to entering an uncertain amount of time remaining at home per state mandates. It has become obvious that self-care has never been more important to protect ourselves against unhealthy patterns and be sure we are regulating our emotions. We suggest close attention to these FIVE areas to insure a balanced lifestyle during this challenging time.

1. Balanced Eating.

Depression and anxiety can cause appetite loss or for some binge eating. If you are having trouble with balanced eating due to the changes in the schedule you were previously following, you may need to set an alarm every three hours to eat a small meal or a healthy snack. Recommended foods that are high fuel are eggs, yogurt, lean meat, raw greens, berries, and nuts. Cane sugar should be eaten in small amounts and replaced with stevia as a healthier sweetener choice. Comfort foods should be monitored and when consuming them portions should be measured to avoid eating large amounts unintentionally. Staying hydrated is also important. We suggest that you measure the ounces of water you are drinking to be sure you are consuming approximately half your body weight in ounces each day.

2. Good Sleep Regimen.

Creating a bedtime routine or using one that has already worked well is very important. Decrease or eliminate screen time 30 minutes prior to going to bed, especially news coverage or other content that may cause anxiety or frustration. For those having a difficult time sleeping since the quarantine began, the following suggestions may be helpful. An hour prior to bedtime take a warm shower or bath, read an enjoyable book, listen to calming instrumental music (music without lyrics allows the mind to rest), pray, meditate, practice mindfulness, and some may consider taking melatonin. Watch how much caffeine you are consuming as you may be more sensitive to it at this time. If sleep issues last for more than a week a doctor should be contacted.

3. Stay Connected but Not Too Connected.

Feeling isolated or disconnected is one of the biggest challenges for many, especially those who do not have access to social media and devices for teleconferencing. However, at times there can be an over exposure to social media which can cause challenges. People may begin comparing their life circumstances with others, creating further discouragement. Most people have access to watching the news for updates related to the virus and reopening the states, yet again an over exposure to this information can cause increased anxiety and despair. The key is creating balance each day by developing a to-do list of the activities you will engage in. Add social media and news into your schedule and hold yourself accountable to avoid overdosing on these communication tools.

4. Give Yourself a Break.

It is common for us to think the expectations we typically have for ourselves and others should remain the same, however, that is not the case. This can cause an increase in anxiety, depression, and anger. The Coronavirus has created the need for us to step back and look at our most basic needs, many things we generally take for granted. For this reason, we want to be sure that we lower our expectations to what is most appropriate and achievable each day under the circumstances we are experiencing. Reassess your goals, perhaps write new goals for this time, and give yourself praise for the little things because they matter.

5. Find Moments to Create.

You may have more time on your hands than you have had in quite some time. Perhaps your house is cleaner than it has been in years, or maybe it is a mess because you are homeschooling four children. Regardless of your situation finding time to be creative is incredibly therapeutic. Some ideas are to search Pinterest for DIY projects in which you have the supplies already in your home, color, draw, or paint, write a poem, or begin journaling, listen to your favorite music and write a new verse to that song, woodworking, create a collage using old magazines, scrapbooking or playdough. Create with your children and create on your own. Being creative allows us to learn, grow, and process the emotions we are experiencing.

For more information on developing a better balance during this time or to submit a specific question use our Contact Us tab and someone will get back to you.

Am I Sad or Depressed?

by Amy Thomas | Apr 20, 2020

When you are going through a tough time it is normal to feel down for a while. Emotions like sadness and grief help make us human. But if you are feeling sad or miserable most of the time over a long period of time, you might have depression. How will you know if it is sadness or depression?

Here are a few questions to ask yourself. Use the following scale.

NOT AT ALL · SEVERAL DAYS · MORE THAN HALF THE DAYS · NEARLY EVERY DAY

How often have you been bothered by feeling down, depressed, irritable, or hopeless over the last two weeks?
How often have you been bothered that you have little interest or pleasure in doing things over the last two weeks?
How often have you been bothered by trouble falling asleep, staying asleep, or sleeping too much over the last two weeks?
How often have you been bothered that you have poor appetite, weight loss, or overeating over the last two weeks?
How often have you been bothered by feeling bad about yourself – or feeling that you are a failure, or that you have let yourself or your family down over the last two weeks?

Answering these questions honestly can give you a better idea how you are coping during difficult times in your life or major changes such as job loss, illness, and isolation. If your answers are “several days” or more frequent for any of these questions, I would encourage you to head to the site listed below to take a very quick quiz, 8 questions, that will provide a score at the end. This personal assessment will help determine if you should contact someone to talk about what you are experiencing. Mental health is equally as important as caring for our physical health. Unfortunately, many are guilty of placing less importance on this, causing those in need to not reach out for support.

If you or someone you know is or has been bothered by thoughts of hurting themself in some way or sensing that things would be better if they were no longer around, it is very important that a contact is made right away for assistance using this link. https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

Quick Depression Quiz: https://psychcentral.com/quizzes/depression-test/

Use the Contact Us Link to Schedule a FREE counseling discovery call.

World Music Therapy Week 2024

Apr 3, 2024

This blog was written by Robin Neary and Amy Thomas. Happy World Music Therapy week! It brings us joy to know that all around the world music therapists are coming together to celebrate and educate our communities on our profession. This year, Upstate Music Therapy...

The Improve Your Mood Playlist

Sep 1, 2022

Blog Written By Rebecca Szalay Do you ever notice when you are feeling down that you gravitate towards music that reflects that mood? How about when you’re excited? Do you change the music if a slow or sad song comes on because you feel happy? Music has the ability...

Nature’s Instruments: Making Music Outside

May 2, 2022

Spring is finally here! The daffodils are blooming, the Easter bunny made his visits, and families are itching to get out of the house. In the spring, the outside world is full of sounds. Last week, we shared the blog Pause and Hear the Sounds of Spring to practice...

It’s OK to Cry

by Amy Thomas | Apr 13, 2020

During this difficult time, navigating COVID-19 and the changes it has brought into our life, we are grieving. Many of us have lost the most basic things that we so often take for granted, like our daily routine. Perhaps you now have all of your children home, so you are grieving the loss of having quiet mom time or getting your to-do list done. Others are grieving the loss of a job. Some share that losing the freedom of going out into public without fear of becoming ill has been the most difficult adjustment for them. Many students are grieving the loss of seeing their friends and teachers each day and others the loss of a prom, senior year events, and graduation. Teachers are missing their students. Our senior citizens are grieving the loss of familiar faces coming to visit them. Grandparents are feeling the loss of not being able to hug and play with their grandchildren. The most tragic loss, the lives that have been taken by this silent enemy, the coronavirus. The loss is real and deep and spans as wide as our country and across the oceans, as we are not grieving alone. Every country is feeling losses.

So how do we cope? Some will cope by keeping themselves busy. If they stay busy, they will not have time to think about it. I have had others say that they focus on the things they do have, technology for communication with others, a house over their head, food on the table and in some cases, they still have their job. Others cope by talking about how hard this is and how they are pushing through each day for their family who need them. I spoke to a woman the other day who shared that her faith is the prime reason that she gets up each day. She knows that God is in control and that she and her family will get through this. Most of us like to stay strong and focus on what needs to be done each day to navigate all of the losses and changes in our daily lives, but I am here to tell you that “It’s OK to cry”.

The health benefits of crying are immense. Research has found that in addition to being self-soothing, shedding emotional tears releases oxytocin and endorphins. These chemicals make people feel good and may also ease both physical and emotional pain. In this way, crying can help reduce pain and promote a sense of well-being. When humans cry in response to stress, their tears contain a number of stress hormones and other chemicals. Researchers believe that crying could reduce the levels of these chemicals in the body, which could, in turn, reduce stress. More research is needed into this area, however, to confirm this, but it makes sense. So, give yourself permission to take a pause and shed some tears, you will be doing your mind, body and soul a favor. And as always, never try to navigate losses without support. Find a good listener to share your grief and take comfort that you are not in this alone.

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