During this difficult time, navigating COVID-19 and the changes it has brought into our life, we are grieving. Many of us have lost the most basic things that we so often take for granted, like our daily routine. Perhaps you now have all of your children home, so you are grieving the loss of having quiet mom time or getting your to-do list done. Others are grieving the loss of a job. Some share that losing the freedom of going out into public without fear of becoming ill has been the most difficult adjustment for them. Many students are grieving the loss of seeing their friends and teachers each day and others the loss of a prom, senior year events, and graduation. Teachers are missing their students. Our senior citizens are grieving the loss of familiar faces coming to visit them. Grandparents are feeling the loss of not being able to hug and play with their grandchildren. The most tragic loss, the lives that have been taken by this silent enemy, the coronavirus. The loss is real and deep and spans as wide as our country and across the oceans, as we are not grieving alone. Every country is feeling losses.
So how do we cope? Some will cope by keeping themselves busy. If they stay busy, they will not have time to think about it. I have had others say that they focus on the things they do have, technology for communication with others, a house over their head, food on the table and in some cases, they still have their job. Others cope by talking about how hard this is and how they are pushing through each day for their family who need them. I spoke to a woman the other day who shared that her faith is the prime reason that she gets up each day. She knows that God is in control and that she and her family will get through this. Most of us like to stay strong and focus on what needs to be done each day to navigate all of the losses and changes in our daily lives, but I am here to tell you that “It’s OK to cry”.
The health benefits of crying are immense. Research has found that in addition to being self-soothing, shedding emotional tears releases oxytocin and endorphins. These chemicals make people feel good and may also ease both physical and emotional pain. In this way, crying can help reduce pain and promote a sense of well-being. When humans cry in response to stress, their tears contain a number of stress hormones and other chemicals. Researchers believe that crying could reduce the levels of these chemicals in the body, which could, in turn, reduce stress. More research is needed into this area, however, to confirm this, but it makes sense. So, give yourself permission to take a pause and shed some tears, you will be doing your mind, body and soul a favor. And as always, never try to navigate losses without support. Find a good listener to share your grief and take comfort that you are not in this alone.